By Hannah Larson
This year Jeffco Schools have addressed a pressing issue going on district wide. This school year the district has found that they don’t have enough money to give the principals real raises but instead they have discovered a way to make up for it. The district has reportedly found some wiggle room in the budget to fund this new project. They aren’t getting new textbooks, but instead they are giving the principals with a lack of hair a much needed toupee raise. The board finds it critical to have the county’s principals looking their best for the rest of this school year and beyond. Our very own Principal Griff Wirth has been waiting patiently to get this raise since he started losing his hair back in 2008
“I am quite happy with this long-awaited raise. The school has been doing great, and I think it may just help improve student productivity. Besides all of that, doesn’t it just look good?” said Wirth.
Many students have noticed the change in the beloved principal already. “It’s kind of nice; I’m not blinded by reflected light when I go to talk to Mr. Wirth, he is just positively glowing, ” said senior Leo Tonofhair.
This change has the teachers and students oddly motivated and has given positive growth of attractiveness on campus. The Student Senate is even contemplating asking Wirth if he will compete in the male beauty competition Mr.Golden-Ridge.
Senior senator Rapunzel L’oreal said, “We want to go home with the gold this year, and Mr.Wirth may be that key to beating Golden High School with that new toupee of his!”
Some teachers and staff members are hoping that this raise could go school-wide and that they could possibly get their own type of attractive modification.
“I would like some shoe insoles because I am too short to reach my smart board projector button,” said English teacher Kay Landon.
Many students ask questions like “Is this really that important” or “Couldn’t the district spend its money wiser” but what is honestly better than raising the confidence and self-esteem of the principal?
