Breaking News: COVID-19 is an April Fool’s Joke


Bailey Duplessis

Student stuck in a “Stay at Home” order just wants to go outside.

Bailey Duplessis, Sports Editor

Government Official, Ronald Wilson, announced to the public on April 1, 2020, that COVID-19 (Coronavirus) was a government hoax.

“We wanted to see how the general public reacted to a global crisis,” Wilson said, “it definitely gave us some data on how Americans or even just the world handles these situations. I mean, who thought we would run out of toilet paper for a disease that infects your respiratory system?”

“Math problems actually came to life with this situation. Who buys 300 rolls of toilet paper? I think you needed to go to the doctor way before COVID-19 if that was the case. And 100 cases of water? Who said this virus affected our water supply?” asked a teacher at Moonset High School.

The Coronavirus that put us all in quarantine, shut down jobs, and caused a mass panic of a toilet paper shortage, was all an experiment to see how we would react. Some are laughing, some are crying, and some, overall, are just ticked off. “I lost my job over this,” said Carl Jaenke, a waiter at City Cafe.

“My senior year was ruined,” said Avreya Sloan-Shaffer of Wheat Ridge High School

 These are just a couple of responses that a couple of the citizens had to say about these past month events being called fake. 

Wilson also gave another reason for this Corona Hoax and said, “The Earth needed a break. The constant emissions going into the atmosphere was horrible, global warming was at an all-time high.” The people of the world knew what he said was true, but lots were still very upset. 

“I mean, look around! There are animals going into villages and just thriving now that people stayed inside and stopped travel for a month,” said Wilson. “There are monkeys in Thailand that have been waiting for this moment. Tourism is down, so they can finally come to get some food. Or the fact that Venice canals are running clear and dolphins appear in Italy because of their lockdown.” 

These events have cost so many people their jobs, houses, cars, and so much more. It took the joy of school and being with friends away from kids. But, there is always a silver lining, animals are thriving, the earth is doing a little better, you got to bond with your family a little bit more, and the best part, your pets were so excited to see you all day, every day. Also, we learned how to wash our hands and what songs to sing during that process.